End of January already?! This year is going so fast!
Sometimes I am somewhere and I am like “Ooo! I should do a blog post about that!”, yet week after week here I sit wondering “What should I write about this week?”. So with that said here is what was kind of put to mind as I typed that all.
I feel like I drive a lot. I don’t drive nearly as much as some people but I have to drive 10 minutes at least to get to anything. If I am driving alone I sometimes like to just sit and contemplate life. No music. Just wind passing over my car and my car heating system making noise. In those moments I think about storms in life. Why things are happening. How I went wrong. What can I do to fix it. What the other person(s) did. You know, just stuff!
Well one day a few weeks ago I was upset about stuff. I didn’t think my world would end, I was just frustrated that things were going the way they were. I had been at a training course and the lady there was talking about the stuff you can do vs the stuff you can’t, she called it goals vs desires. Let me explain because that sounds confusing.
So basically there are things in the world that you can do; goals! You can show people love. You can always be a listening ear. You can make sure you are well kept. You can do kind deeds randomly for someone. These are all things you can do. What you can’t do; desires. You can't make someone feel loved. You can’t make someone come into a personal relationship with Jesus. You can’t make someone think about maybe doing something nice for you. You can't make someone heal. There are things in life that you can’t do! You may desire that your friend leave a cute present on your bed but you can't make them do it with a loving, cheerful heart or even make them think about doing it. Those are things that others have to desire for themselves; things you can’t push onto a person.
It was difficult for me to come to grips with that. I was going on in my head about how I’d do this, that and the other thing for them and yet they wouldn’t even do this little thing for me. Boy did I have to come down from my high horse. I had to realise that I needed to continue being the person I am because God called me to it, not for the purpose of getting stuff in return!
I will go on record saying that I am not perfect and I still do struggle with this sometimes. But now I always seem to be reminded right away, “Regan what can you do?is this a goal or desire?” I can not change a person to like me. I can’t make a person give me thoughtful gifts. I can not make a person remember me. But I can serve in the capacity that God has given me and do it joyfully with or without returned gratitude. Hard as that is sometimes, I think that the reward in heaven will be far more worth it then any return here on earth. Here’s to being reminded that serving Him is greater.