Anxiety. Wow that’s a biggy. I don’t have all the answers, I have the one answer! So if you’ve read Christmas Adventure you’ll know about an anxiety attack I had just over a year ago now. Anxiety is rough! It can be paralyzing, physically and mentally! You feel like you can’t think straight which just ends up making you more anxious. Or physically where you can feel nauseous or even temporarily paralyzed, it's so scary; this has happened to me and I hate it!
When I think about anxiety I think about all of my experiences with it. Whether it is having my hand tense up and be completely numb or just feeling nauseous it’s been a real thing in my life. I am not here saying I figured out the solution to never having anxiety again but I do think that there is something behind it that causes it. For me it was my mom getting sick. That is when I started getting sick in the mornings just thinking about the day ahead… I think it was an unspoken fear that my mom could drop dead at any moment, that I’d be orphaned of a mom without getting to say goodbye. When she did die my nausea in the mornings went away slowly. So I think it is safe to say that anxiety is stemmed from fear in a lot of cases.
Fear of the unknown.
Fear of no control.
Fear of loss.
Is there any way to combat that fear? Quite honestly I didn’t really recognize the root problem or the surface problem while I was in it. It is the 20/20 vision of hindsight that is making me stroke my chin and say “hmm is that what it was?! That makes so much sense!” So first you need to identify the root issue. That goes for so many things! Being a counsellor at camp I have had to realized that there is always a deeper issue to the outward actions of a child. Then once the root is found you can work. It's like a weed, if you just pull what you see it will come back because the root wasn't destroyed too.
Even realizing that fear was my root issue was hard for me grapple with! I don’t see myself as a fearful person! I fly planes which is something that causes many to look at me very strangely, that doesn’t scare me though because I feel like I have control! But mom being sick was something that no one can control. Like when you are in a cancer situation any minute can bring you on a totally different rollercoaster ride, none of which you ever really expect! So many would say my fear was founded, but then you read “Do not fear for the lord your God is with you…” and realize you have no excuse to fear before the King of kings who is always in control of all things.
It is rough to go through anxiety and I have nothing but love for all of you that do! I still have times where I feel myself verging on an anxiety attack. It is in those moments where I try to calm my mind by completely relying on the Lord. Getting someone to pray for you in that moment is a beautiful reminder of the God that is in control! He is worthy and totally trustworthy!